Articles

Print

Make Monogomy Hot - Why Masturbation is Good for Your Sex Life

Written by Stu Watson

Take masturbation, for instance. If it feels good, do it. "The more orgasms you have, the more your body will crave them," says Cox.

Cox suggests masturbation for those times when we and our partners are apart physically or, in terms of desire, simply when the mood strikes.

"I'd also strongly suggest that you take it one step further and do it in front of each other," she says.

Why? Because doing it and watching it being done can say so much more than words about what turns us on. If this seems a little out-there, gently broach the topic, by noting that you read about it in a magazine article or heard survey results on the radio (even if you didn't).

"If you lead someone slowly through it, they might well drop their inhibitions and go with you," she says. "What doesn't work is dumping them in the deep end. Like saying `Let's masturbate in front of each other!' to a partner who's only just come to grips with having the lights on."

As for other things you might like to try but aren't quite sure will sit well with your partner, Cox suggests finding a hot-selling sex guide. Then look up the activity about which you're interested, and see how it is categorized as a variation, or a deviation relative to the norm.

You might enjoy watching a little nonviolent pornography, for instance. Start with "couples porn" by women directors such as Candida Royale.

In Cox's book, almost anything goes, if two people agree on it, with one exception: "The only thing I'm really, really anti is any sort of sex that involves other people," she says.

That includes affairs, which she says are horribly destructive, and group sex. "The minute you introduce another body into a room, you've got problems."

Fantasize all you want, but when it comes to making love, love only your partner.

And remember: It's OK to say "no," but more beneficial and fun to step outside the comfort zone a little, says Cox. "Unless we do that, we can't grow sexually."

Related Items

Communication and Commitment

3 Myths about Self Confidence


 

Joomla! Debug Console

Session

Profile Information

Memory Usage

Database Queries