- ego Tag Tue, 23 May 2017 05:25:50 +0000 Joomla! - Open Source Content Management en-gb Attachments and How They Undermine Your Courage! If there were one item you could take with you when you pass on, what would it be?decisions about life passion

My dear and gracious friend “Aunt Gert” said many times, “Honey, you ever seen a U-Haul truck pull up with the Hearse?” You cannot take it with you! “ An attachment, writes Anthony De Mello in Awareness, is a belief that without something you are not going to be happy. Once you get convinced of that—and it gets into our subconscious, it gets stamped into the roots of our being—you are finished.”

While you are alive, attachments, whether to material items or social values, may make you feel safe and comfortable, yet they limit your enjoyment of new experiences in the present moment. In A New Earth Eckhart Tolle reprimands us, “Ego-identification with things creates attachment to things, obsession with things, which in turn creates our consumer society and economic structures where the only measure of progress is always more. The unchecked striving for more, for endless growth, is a dysfunction and a disease.” 

Do you seek security through an attachment to your home? Your ethnic group? Your denomination? Your job title?

The decision to be content with only the material world or to strive after the spiritual world is always your choice. Do you have a staunch attachment to some belief that prevents you from manifesting your courage? Do you hover in scarcity mentality and unconsciously stay attached to the almighty paycheck while your dreams wither for lack of spiritual nourishment? Are you willing to let go of your possessive attitude toward everything? What do you pine for?

Try making a list of the things to which you are attached. Review your list and assess where and how these attachments found a home in your psyche. Stopping your attachment and learning to become indifferent to the outcome should not be confused with loss of spirit or passion. Spirit and passion remain constant. Saint Teresa discovered that attachments “are an expression of an inner hunger.” Tolle continues, “Attachment to things drops away by itself when you no longer seek to find yourself in them.” Non-attachment centers you in Being and all its daily joy.

Make courage your daily legacy.

Sandra Ford Walston is known as The Courage Expert. She is a speaker and coach who has written numerous books including COURAGE The Heart and Spirit of Every Woman, the follow-up book The COURAGE Difference at Work:: A Unique Success Guide for Women and non-gender FACE IT! 12 Courageous Actions that Bring Success at Work and Beyond.

Read more]]> (Sandra Ford Walston) Life Sun, 11 Oct 2015 19:52:16 +0000
FACE IT! To Forgive Someone Takes Courage how to forgive

What is forgiveness? How do you go about forgiving? What happens when you actually go ahead and forgive?

Forgiving requires a courageous choice. The courageous choice is whether you are willing to consent to this healing.

In Greek, to forgive means “to let go.” Forgiveness is offered without conditions. Using techniques such as forgiveness meditation/prayers or stopping to apply internal reflection, forgiveness can be centered on someone alive or someone who has passed on. In letting go and forgiving, the process is not about wishing they would change.

Forgiveness should not be confused with reconciliation. Reconciliation requires mutual interest with someone alive and restores the relationship or situation.

Many times, at the deepest core of our heart, it takes an abundance of courage to forgive. If you have read any of my courage postings you know that the origin of the word courage is corage, Medieval Old French meaning “heart and spirit.”

For me, there are times I can sense I have built up resentment toward someone—they didn’t do what I wanted them to do or expected them to do. When my projected expectations are not met, I allow the ego to create modes of suffering. The suffering shows up in many forms such as incessant mind chatter or in the evening when I am unable to go to sleep because I have become obsessed in the resentment.

If I am a witness to the suffering I have created I can ask myself, “Do I want to give up my resentment?” Inspirational author Catherine Ponder said, “When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.” Without the process of forgiveness, a hole in my spirit widens.

Forgiveness is a process of the heart. If I apply energy (the word virtue in Latin, means “energy”) from my reservoir of courage to “step up” and forgive, then it benefits me to let go of those harmful emotions that perpetuate the lingering suffering such as fear, angry or pride. Energy follows intentions. I can forgive, and choose life! Embracing my courage, I am able to forgive and move on. I asked myself three reflective questions and responded with answers. Why don’t you do the same?

 Q. In what ways do I resist forgiving others?

A. After a period of critical reflection, I answered this question: “When I resist forgiving others I know I am attached to my judgments about how they are wrong and I am right.” Creating and living in this duality (wrong versus right) is not how I choose to live my life. Duality (pretty/ugly; bad/good; black/white; peace/war; hubris/humility) keeps me stuck in a vicious pattern of behavior.

Q. In what ways do I resist forgiving myself?

A. Applying vulnerability to my courage I responded with these insights: My berating manifests in a variety of ways such as my embarrassment that I would be so righteous in thinking I was better and more “special” than another human being. Forgiving myself requires that I recognize these lower levels of courage consciousness. Then, I can start to adjust by behaviors and grow spiritually.

Q. What will I achieve if I forgive?

A. When I choose to forgive those who are alive and who have passed on, I am free—free from being stuck in the past. I am no longer a victim attached to my worn-out scripts about what they did to me. I can apply my God-given, everyday courage to consciously choose a different, functional path. Soon I am no longer attached to incidents of the past, and my suffering starts to diminish. My heart has more “space” to invite grace or what I call “where courage meets grace.” 

Forgiveness opens a new space in the heart and this space radiates goodness. The famous Indian mystic and enlightened master Osho said, “The heart is always right—if there’s a question of choosing between the mind and the heart—because mind is a creation of the society. It has been educated. You have been given it by the society, not by existence. The heart is unpolluted.”

What goes through your heart changes you! Many spiritual people showed us this energy such as Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Mother Teresa and Dietrich Bonhoeffer. When you identify, claim and apply the original definition of courage, you develop a “courageous will” to forgive. Then, you’re the one who is set free. You receive the blessing. This divine grace consumes your heart.

Who is it that you want to forgive in 2013?



Sandra Ford Walston is known as The Courage Expertand innovator of StuckThinking™. Featured on the speaker circuit as witty, provocative, concrete and insightful, she has sparked positive change in the lives of thousands of leaders each year. She found that there is a direct correlation between your success quotient and your courage quotient.

She is the internationally published author of bestseller COURAGEThe Heart and Spirit of Every Woman, the follow-up book to COURAGE,The COURAGE Difference at Work: A Unique Success Guide for Women (formerlySTUCK) and FACE IT! 12 Courageous Actions Bring Success at Work and Beyond. All three books are on based 20 years of original courage research. She is certified in the Enneagram and MBTI® and she is a Newfield Network coach. Please

Watch this YouTube:Courageous Leadership

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Read more]]> (Sandra Ford Walston) Life Fri, 21 Dec 2012 02:53:31 +0000
Practicing Spiritual Courage to find the Answers Looking to retire? New job? Want to transition to something new?  First, startpractice contemplation by asking yourself some good questions:

•  Do you seek security through an attachment to your home?

•  Your ethnic group? Your denomination? Your job title?

•  Do you have a staunch attachment to some belief that prevents you from manifesting your courage?

Read more]]> (Sandra Ford Walston) Life Sat, 28 Jul 2012 22:12:41 +0000
Spiritual Courage at Work, An Inside Job To recognize everyday courage, it helps to distinguish the various facets of courage. There is physical courage (the one our culture identifies with the most), political courage, leadershipcourage at work courage, moral courage, and personal courage, to name a few. Some of us manifest certain types of courage well but come up short in other areas. In this article, I will expand on the concept of spiritual courage, and how it works to become an inside job both at work and home.

Read more]]> (Sandra Ford Walston) Career Sun, 08 Jul 2012 15:11:26 +0000
Courage & Leadership, a Smart Lifestyle Choice Notice reality, choose and then act on your choices.

When you begin to live in the present you can recognize when you are selling your soul. Forfacing reality and making change example, people assume that finding a new job will be difficult, so they remain complacent, mistakenly believing—or simply hoping—that things will change. Yet, in reality, situations seldom change by themselves. To show courage, decide when it’s time to face the truth or prompt a change: then, be eager to discover the next opportunity. Facing the facts and taking action are required if you wish to change your life.

You will discover that there is a direct correlation between your “courage quotient” and your “success quotient.”

The concepts of courage-centered living are deceptively simple. The mind (ego) will want to undermine them. After all, how could something so easy work? In the article “Simple Courage,” René Da Costa writes that people demonstrate a tendency to shun simplicity for complexity. “Simplicity takes talent and dedication.… It takes courage to advocate simplicity. Simplicity has nowhere to hide and neither do those who advocate it.”

We become courageous by being courageous. It’s that simple! All you have to do is decide whether this forgotten virtue is worth learning. Leadership qualities are defined by courage, such as asking for the tough project or staying focused on the results.

What would motivate you to explore where this ancient virtue fits into your work life?


Sandra Ford Walston is known as The Courage Expert and innovator of StuckThinking™. She is an organizational effectiveness consultant, speaker, trainer and courage coach. She is the internationally published author of bestseller COURAGE The Heart and Spirit of Every Woman (2001), the follow-up book STUCK 12 Steps Up the Leadership Ladder (2010) and the recently released FACE IT! 12 Obstacles that Hold You Back on the Job (2011). She is certified in the Enneagram and MBTI®. Please visit

Read more]]> (Sandra Ford Walston) Career Wed, 23 May 2012 17:48:41 +0000